Friday, May 16, 2003

I'm Tired

This is from Todd Hunter's blog.

“If you fill your calendar with important appointments, you’ll have no time for God; if you fill your spare time with essential reading, you will starve your soul; if you fill your mind with worry about budget and offerings, the pains in your shoulder and chest will betray you; if you try to conform to the expectations of those around you, you will forever be their slave. Work a modest day, then step back and rest—this will keep you close to God.” (Author unknown to me)

My current work place—Allelon, and my current boss—Mark Priddy, and my favorite “roommate”, Eric Keck, are the most encouraging and enabling people I have ever worked with to “work a modest day and go home to family and rest”. Yet, I still have a hard time truly resting. I go home to family and work…real rest rarely seems to be found. Be clear, I’m not blaming anyone: this, AGAIN! is a condition of my heart.

I am not rested. It caused some depression earlier in the month. I seem to have snapped out of it, but I'm still weary enough to be pretty vulnerable. It never seems spiritual to sleep, but I think it is wise.

My hope is not to separate my "ministry life" from my "home life." I don't think Jesus ever did that. But Jesus rested a lot. He partied a lot. He reflected a lot. We really don't know how much he "worked." But I'm convinced that most of my "ministry work" needs to be building spiritual disciplines in myself and in our leaders. This work will begin June 1 as we have two that have accepted the call to our Vision Team. I'm looking forward to it.

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